“For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,”
declares the Lord.
As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts.
In a similar way that God’s thoughts are not my thoughts, the thoughts of my true self are not the thoughts of my ego. When I meditate this becomes more apparent. As I mentioned in a previous post I think of my true self inhabiting this reality by wearing “reality spacesuit” which consist of both my body and my mind. I think of the mind as a computer built into the spacesuit itself. The spacesuit’s mind is my ego. Because my spacesuit has a mind, it thinks for itself. When I am not aware, I mistake these thoughts of the spacesuit with myself. But really, its thoughts are not my thoughts.
When I meditate I can observe the spacesuit’s thoughts in action. With practice, over time, I begin to see this distinction in my every day life. Without practice I cannot distinguish between myself and the thoughts of my spacesuit. This realization carries with it two conclusions. First, the “I as observer” is different from the thoughts I observe. Second, if I must wear this spacesuit to inhabit this reality, then this suggests I am not indigenous to this reality (otherwise I would be able to naturally inhabit this reality).
I suppose my true home is heaven. For some reason I have forgotten what heaven is really like and I do not know the reason why I have forgotten this information.
My ego (the mind of the spacesuit) is bound up with my reality spacesuit. It identifies with the spacesuit. My ego wants my true self to remain asleep so that there exists the belief that the reality spacesuit is the real self and this reality is all there is. As such, my ego is inherently dishonest and perpetuates falsehoods constantly.
By contrast my true self is inherently honest but has a tendency to fall asleep within the reality spacesuit. Perhaps inhabiting the spacesuit is taxing to it because this reality is not the reality it was designed to inhabit. Regardless, meditation seems to be a way to wake my true self up and keep it awake. Regular and continuous meditation develops this muscle of staying awake. The stronger the muscle the better able the true self can maintain awareness.
But then again, this is all speculation. I do not know for certain that any of this is an accurate depiction of the underpinnings of my experience in this world. Parts of it seem to make sense at times. Meditation, however, does not go down the road of speculation. It abides simply and clearly in the present moment. It observes. That is all it does. There is a beauty in this simplicity.
Where did I come from? What was it like there? Why am I here? As for these ultimate questions, it seems that I can never know the answers while I inhabit this reality. Again, I can speculate but speculations without confirmation seems to be of limited value.